New Year Resolutions

The time has come to make New Year Resolutions. Don’t make resolutions like the mom who resolved to give up all her son’s hair at Tirupathi. Make ones you can keep. There are four areas of your life where resolutions could transform your year.


Personal
Family
Work
Social


The space where you have the most control is the most important personal quadrant. I know guys who have given up smoking, because it can add atleast 7 years to their life. But then they give it up atleast once a month. Which really is the problem with resolutions. They are so difficult to keep for a whole year. Here are some simple resolutions

• Every day is a celebration. I will do something every day that I have never done before.
• I will enjoy one week day evening and weekends with my family with cell phones and laptop switched off.
• I will learn something totally new, professionally
• I will keep in touch with old friends and meet them at least once a month.

Creating a positive interpersonal field.

A drug addict once explained the difference between sympathy and empathy. He said, ‘You can never feel anything but sympathy for me and what I need is empathy. Empathy is the capacity to feel my pain in your heart.’ To be ‘socially tone-deaf’, a term coined by Peter Solovey, can lead to a life littered with broken relationships. Develop the capacity
to pick up subtle verbal, tonal and non-verbal signals from others. Learn also the ability to send out soothing, nurturing signals to others, thus creating a positive interpersonal field. In order to develop this skill, practice working with people and listening to them with the same attitude as you would a beloved child, or respected parent. Your word, tone, glance should be completely focused on the person. When you are with someone, pay complete attention. Anything less will only elicit a lukewarm response. Those who can create positive fields around themselves attract and build lifetime relationships.

A recent happiness survey shows that hairdressers have the highest levels of happiness at work! The reason? They are in direct touch with their customers. Chris Humphries, Director General of City and Guilds U.K., says: Nowadays, job satisfaction and happiness is about fulfilling your potential, tapping into your own creativity and feeling that you can make a difference. Many are exchanging their desk-bound jobs for vocations that enable them to be hands-on, use their brains and be in charge of their own destiny.
In a Guardian article by Laura Smith, two out of five hairdressers
described themselves as extremely happy. She gives two reasons:
1. Creativity
2. Contact with customers

A study commissioned by the Qualifications Authority of City and
Guilds published the following results:

Happiest

Clergy
Beauticians
Plumbers

Unhappiest

Social workers
Architects
Estate agents
Insurance Agents
Secretaries

Those in practical jobs enjoyed a lot more social interaction.

Towards Personal Happiness

The world is in your drawing room, it is clamoring to change your life with more and more sophisticated toys. As a popular saying goes, ‘What separates the men from the boys is just the price of their toys.’ Simplify and go home to what you really need.

Any of the big five emotions—kama, kroda, madha, lobha, matsarya (lust, anger, arrogance, greed, jealousy, respectively) can flood the body with the chemicals of stress. Stress is destructive. To recreate the garden of your mind, creates happiness, you have to get rid of the anger, hatred, fear, greed and jealousy. If you really want to be happy, you need to plant the flowers of love, the fountain of companionship, liberate the butterflies of laughter.

On the Cusp of Change

* Take care of your health. You cannot deliver a prize-winning performance with a broken-down body.
* Force the world to look at issues like: What kind of world are we leaving for our children? Where have leisure, poetry and caring been banished? Why has the door been shut on the smiles and joy of our children? Why do we have no time for our friends or small acts of kindness? Why are deadlines so terrible that they extract death as the price? None of us would mind dying for great causes, but to die for a power-point presentation, seems slightly frivolous.
* Do not get stereotyped into how others see your role: as a mother or an all forgiving rescuer in the workplace. Encourage men to discover their so-called feminine qualities of sensitivity and caring. Do not stereotype men!
* Affirm women who are role models instead of trying to find chinks in their armour. Network with them. There is a queen-bee complex, which causes successful women managers to surround themselves with male managers and discourage the entry of women. Identify this and speak up when required.
* There are points in a woman’s life-cycle when her intensive physical presence is needed. There are high priority interactions which cannot be delegated. Build a support system with family, household staff, neighbours and friends to help you enjoy these
times. Men too have been deprived of active participation in these peak experiences in the past. Make your company recognise and respond to these realities.
* Hitch your wagon to the pursuit of daily and consistent learning. Be Saraswati. Bring your heritage of creating wholeness from leftovers, and wealth from waste. Be Lakshmi. Call forth the courage to speak, write and act for what is true and good for all.
Be Shakti. Be all woman. Be all human.

Pleasant Music to Empower Your Mindspace

‘Music has the power to purify the emotional field like nothing else,’ Our mindscape trembles with the joy of old songs half-remembered, snatches of tunes hummed by our mother. Every day we could choose the sounds we allow into our field. Perhaps we could set a song for the day in our mind. Those who meet us would see the sparkle of that song in our eyes and feel the rhythm of its harmony in our limbs.

‘Shabdh or sound is Vani Saraswathi, the Goddess of Learning. Words are sacred to her.
Choose to say beautiful words, to hear lovely words. Banish harsh, angry and foul language from the inner spaces of your heart,’ Pour music into your soul. Touch people who love you. Explore new places. Reach into great books and study alternate futures.
Pamper yourself and ask your loved ones for hugs. Meditate. Be silent. Plug into the universe. Let go. Let God catch you. Your sankalpa or intention must be pure. Be clear about your goal. Be non-judgemental. Love and seek to understand with tenderness.

Healthy Environment for healthy living!

In order to treat or prevent disease, it is essential to look into our emotional, mental and psychological environment, as our thoughts and emotions directly contribute to our wellbeing or otherwise. Emotions like love, courage, humour, compassion wonder and peace create a positive and energetic environment . Meditation helps you to achieve these energy and contribute enormously to an individual’s psychological and physiological wellbeing.

How to create a positive and energetic environment around yourself, your home and office?

 A mental process which draws a magic circle of love around all those who are participating.

 A prayer or mantra said together.

 A common exercise, a company song, common goals.

 A handshake, a friendly look, an encouraging word.

 Thinking, believing and acting in a positive manner.

 Laughter and shared jokes.

Every Day is a Celebration!

Celebrate the positive in all interactions. Sprinkle the pure waters of prayer on your soul and prepare afresh for a brand-new day. Go peacefully amidst the noise and the haste. Enjoy the sweetness of everyday things. When we say namaste, we say ‘I bow to the Divine in you’. ‘Vasudeva Kutumbakam’ say, our holy book – the whole world is your family. Imagine the rich network of love you could create, where your children can be nurtured if you believed and practiced this.

The most inexpensive ticket to happiness is not found on makemy trip.com. It is found in helping others and making others happy. You don’t have to visit Aids victims in Africa and make them happy. You can start with your own family, neighbours, cook, cleaner and friends. As the slogan at the Paro Airport in Bhutan says, ‘Gross National Happiness begins with a smile’. So spread happiness like Amul butter on bread. It will stick to your fingers.

Creative Marketing

To create teams and understand simple implementation skills that are crucial to the success of marketing plans.

To analyze the innovative ways in which the marketing mix can be restructured for higher Profitability.

To develop new products and services that can provide the cutting edge for competitive advantage.

To recreate the concept of place and access and make distribution channels more customer friendly through creativity tools.

To add value to the concept of price through consideration. This module will enable the company to increase the price without losing customers.

Shangri-La

There is a place in the distant mountains which is always calm and peaceful, where the earth is laden with luscious fruit and wholesome grain, where people are vital, healthy and happy. Where every edifice is artistic and beauty clothes every home in the loveliness of hand made artifacts and the community is one happy family. Shangri-La is the result of Mankind’s effort to create this happy town, city and finally nation. Shangri-La is not really a place. It is inside everyone’s own heart. The dream city is only a reflection of our own peaceful, happy heart.

Action plans to make happiness ‘infectious’ in your Shangri-La

1. Make many friends, who get together to laugh, work, read and share.
2. Plant more trees.
3. Clean up the roads.
4. Start walking and playing together with the kids on the street.
5. Share the knowledge, play, beauty and wisdom. Create the ‘village’ which is needed to raise a child in your community.
6. Use garbage to create gardens and get everything bright and blooming.

Today, start making your own street or building a Shangri-La…

Divine forces of the Universe

We draw energy from the wind, air and sunlight, from water, earth and things grown on the earth. We also draw energy from the divine forces of the universe which pour into us through the chakras. The sun pours heat, light and vitality, which greatly improves health and wellbeing. People who are deprived of the sunlight suffer from depression during winter months, especially in the Scandinavian countries and the Arctic. A place can have a positive or negative field. You can feel it when you enter a temple or church where regular services are performed. That is why people go to places of pilgrimage like Tirupathi. The feeling of prayerful sacredness envelops all those who go there. The reason was that the whole silent congregation was prayerful and there was none there with evil intentions in his heart

We must also learn to handle our failures with confidence and grace as it is only an event, not our whole life. We must learn from failure. We should tap into the peace and silence of the universe which is always available to us. The world is a positive and healthy place.

Reciprocate love

You are the mirror in which all your loved ones see themselves. You can soothe and inspire them by reflecting back an image that is lovable and competent. Calvin Cooley, renowned sociologist has described the Mirror Image thus: ‘I am what I think you think I am.’ If you constantly put down others, you can destroy them mentally. Their unhappiness can harm your mindscape. Accept your family as they are. Unrealistic expectations about your child can put unrelenting pressure on him/her. Mills and Boon expectations of your spouse can make them feel unloved and inadequate. They can then become cranky and difficult. Compete only with yourself. Take pleasure in others’ growth and achievement. Keep the child in you alive. Cuddle, nurture and liberate the child in you.

Mindful Parent

Children need the security of a simple, dependable schedule. Ambiguity or lack of dependability in family life is known to affect the individual’s capacity to live in a secure long-term relationship in the future. The family provides the love and nurturing required for the survival of children Affirmation is important when people in our lives appreciate us and express it verbally, tonally, non-verbally. The opposite of an affirmation is a discount. You need at least ten affirmations for every discount for the maintenance of a healthy relationship. A home filled with discounts becomes a torture chamber instead of a sanctuary.

Healthy diet is very important for children’s growth. Forget grandma’s belief that fat children are healthy children. The Zero Heart Attack Path (ZHAP)diet is just as good for kids. A ZHAP home will provide the foundation for a healthy adulthood. These years are dangerous years when unhealthy emotional patterns are learnt. Food often becomes a source of solace. Be a mindful parent.

Emotional Environment for Happiness

In order to treat or prevent disease, it is essential to look into our emotional, mental and psychological environment, as our thoughts and emotions directly contribute to our wellbeing or otherwise. Meditation can clean up the field and contribute enormously to an individual’s psychological and physiological wellbeing.

How to create a positive field around yourself, your home and office?

Ø A mental process which draws a magic circle of love around all those who are participating.

Ø A prayer or mantra said together.

Ø A common exercise, a company song, common goals.

Ø A handshake, a friendly look, an encouraging word.

Ø Thinking, believing and acting in a positive manner.

Ø Laughter and shared jokes.

Give yourself happiness breaks every day: call an old, lonely relative and take her shopping once a month. Schedule a beauty parlour date for yourself, once a month. Read a great book. Listen to fabulous music.

Healthy Networking for Happiness

The world is in your drawing room, through television and internet it is clamouring to change your life with more and more sophisticated toys. As a popular saying goes, ‘What separates the men from the boys, is just the price of their toys.’ Simplify and go home to what you really need. The world is like a buffet counter at a five-star hotel. Let’s not grab everything on our plates. Let us be choosy, so that we may avoid spiritual indigestion and physical exhaustion. Let us put family first. Finding a job you love is one of the ways you can immunize yourself against health problems. A good marriage is a protective shield against health attacks. One should consistently cultivate the positive emotions of love, compassion, courage and peace, not merely avoid negative emotions in the family.

1. Budget for family time every day

2. Plan for meals together

3. Pray together

4. Plan an annual get together of the extended family.

5. Create a family face book page

Healthy Networking for Happiness

The world is in your drawing room, through television and internet it is clamouring to change your life with more and more sophisticated toys. As a popular saying goes, ‘What separates the men from the boys, is just the price of their toys.’ Simplify and go home to what you really need. The world is like a buffet counter at a five-star hotel. Let’s not grab everything on our plates. Let us be choosy, so that we may avoid spiritual indigestion and physical exhaustion. Let us put family first. Finding a job you love is one of the ways you can immunize yourself against health problems. A good marriage is a protective shield against health attacks. One should consistently cultivate the positive emotions of love, compassion, courage and peace, not merely avoid negative emotions in the family.

1. Budget for family time every day

2. Plan for meals together

3. Pray together

4. Plan an annual get together of the extended family.

5. Create a family face book page

Build Family Bonding

‘The family is the shock absorber of society, to which the bruised and battered individual returns after doing battle with the world,’ wrote Alvin Toffler in his classic ‘Future Shock’. The breakdown of the joint family has led to a loosening of extended family relationships. The large, amorphous, supportive joint family that supported a wide variety of people and bestowed unconditional love for the crippled, the old and the helpless, has been reduced to the nuclear family where everyone is in sharp focus.

It is our mission to restore the family to its traditional role as a place of rest and healing, in a new paradigm. There should be one person in the family who can cushion the blows of the outside world. Someone who is not too busy to listen, give support, and manage the daily tasks of living. This could even be a paid caregiver or cook. Networking with parents, in-laws, neighbours, domestic help and friends is the key for working couples.

Protective Friendships

Friendship can immunize you against heart attacks, confirms research by Dean Ornish, MD. Those with five or more close friends are more likely to avoid heart problems. The real epidemic is not heart attacks but attacks of loneliness and sadness. Those who feel their wives love them, are more likely to recover from a heart attacks says the same research.

The basis of social success lies in the ability to build successful, pleasantly harmonious, lifetime relationships with all. When you meet anyone, always look for what is good. Listen for value. Celebrate the positive in all interactions. Rest assured that God did not create you for the sole purpose of correcting others or making them unhappy. You are not the world’s policeman.

Belonging to a supportive nurturing group is the best protection you can have against disease and unhappiness. Being loved can prevent you from the flood of negative emotions that have the capacity to destroy you. Take steps today to make sure that you cannot be replaced by a blanket or a computer.

Explore Yourself

‘Every person has before him a hundred alternative futures. You can change that scene, by spending more time with your family. The mind is the only place where you can examine a germinal, fragile new idea, stretch it without breaking it or explore an explosive new idea without having it blow up in your face. Use thinking tools and imaging to analyse, reinvent and recreate life as it is today. You are a powerhouse of potential. The great Michelangelo was once asked how he created great statues. Old and half blind, Michelangelo stood before a block of marble, scarred and muddy from the quarries of Carrara. He said quietly, ‘I have never created a statue. I just stand before a block of marble and study it with reverence. For I know that within every block of marble, there lies a statue, waiting to be liberated by the touch of the Within each of us lies hidden a masterpiece waiting to be liberated by the magic touch of attention. Only you can do it. Be your own ‘expert’. Do not build negative ideas about yourself through the comments of others. Your self-talk should be calm, happy and elevating. Choose to see and hear what is beautiful and encouraging.

Contentment - Path to Happiness.

Contentment with whatever you have is the greatest path to happiness. Comparison with those better than us makes us discontented. Comparison with those who are worse off makes us proud and arrogant. Shanti or a peaceful, calm mind, suffused with affection and compassion, makes our field a happy one while spreading like a fragrance to embrace all those around us. Everyone has only two choices—life-enhancing and lifedestroying. An event is not as critical as is your reaction or perception of it. It continues its life inside you, a nuclear landmine of memories that wreak far more destruction than the actual event. The more mindspace you allocate to unhappy memories, the more time you spend in the past while being a spectator in the living present, the more you miss the joy the present moment offers. At any given time, the past should not inhabit more than five per cent of your mindspace, and the future should not exceed ten per cent. Did you know that human beings are the only creatures who can think about the future? This ability should be devoted to a rational planning exercise, not aimless daydreaming that nibbles at your day like a rat in a godown of rice. We have a choice to look at failure and loss as a life-lesson, or to carry it with us till we are bent over with their crippling burden. They make us tired and discouraged to handle the opportunities of the present. They echo in our mindspace in a tone that is vicious, critical, chipping away at our resolve to do battle for progress. We need to change the way we talk to and treat ourselves. All of us need a tender, loving caretaker within who nurtures us, not an internal drillmaster who victimises us in an insulting and disparaging tone, sucking out all our energy, enthusiasm and happiness.

Overcoming the Failures and Loss

No one can avoid bad times, but you can ensure that you look at this time as a time for growth and learning. When the mind-numbing pain that immediately follows loss has subsided, you can take proactive steps to provide emergency attention to heal your body, mind and spirit. Pour music into your soul. Touch people who love you. Explore new places. Reach into great books and study alternate futures. Pamper yourself and ask your loved ones for hugs. Meditate. Be silent. Plug into the universe. Let go. Let God catch you. Your sankalpa or intention must be pure. Be clear about your goal. Be non-judgmental. Love and seek to understand with tenderness.

Learn and immerse yourself in knowledge. Learn all you can about your chosen field from books, internet, from people, competitors. Remain focused. Never give up. Help others, motivate them! Let others achieve their targets. Say no to negative people and emotions. Go on to achieve your highest potential. Look for the highest in others. Know your purpose on earth, the highest that God created you to become to question injustice. Stand up for those who cannot fight, speak for those who have no voice. Speak gently and with love. Receive his compliments, gifts and encouragement with grace.

Admire the beauty of Nature

This is a very useful, feel-good emotion. Welcome wonder into you life. Celebrate the beauty of the stars, and enjoy the wonder of the mountains. Greet the dawn and say goodbye to the sunset. The moonlight has been created to heal your wounds. Admire the beauty of Mother Nature and become a child again.

* Be alone in silence with nature at the beginning and end of every day.

* Enjoy a walk among tall trees and green gardens.

* Plant seeds and saplings. Distribute them.

* Set apart time for prayer to praise God for His glorious creation.

* Set apart time to enjoy beauty.

Admire the beauty of Nature

This is a very useful, feel-good emotion. Welcome wonder into you life. Celebrate the beauty of the stars, and enjoy the wonder of the mountains. Greet the dawn and say goodbye to the sunset. The moonlight has been created to heal your wounds. Admire the beauty of Mother Nature and become a child again.

* Be alone in silence with nature at the beginning and end of every day.

* Enjoy a walk among tall trees and green gardens.

* Plant seeds and saplings. Distribute them.

* Set apart time for prayer to praise God for His glorious creation.

* Set apart time to enjoy beauty.

Better way to reduce stress

One way to break the pattern of stressful living and strive for personal wellness is to change the responses to tough situations. There is, of course, no way to make the situations less tough. Meditation and pranayama provide a way of reducing the automatic and violent reactions to stress. You can actually control autonomous systems like heartbeat and pulse rate, which were thought to be outside the individual’s control. Knowing and practising meditation can provide you with a silent space where you can retreat into peace: slow breathing, steady heartbeat, low pulse. This space is always available within a person who has learnt to meditate.

Modern Women in Dual Role

Women have moved into the workforce in an unmistakable wave. In modern societies today, many of them bear the dual burden of managing a home and career. The infrastructure necessary to help them: crèches, dependable childcare, help from husbands, gadgets to make housework easier, is not yet in place. This generation of transitional women is at high risk from heart disease, particularly during the menopausal years. Statistics show that women have fifty per cent chance of dying of heart disease, ten times higher than their risk of dying by breast cancer. Dual responsibilities have reduced the woman’s capacity to perform her role of a primary caregiver. Her ability to absorb and reduce tensions has been greatly compromised. A common response is the super-mom syndrome. This is a woman who feels that she can be a super career woman and a super-mom. Maintaining this dazzling image can have a damaging impact on the overall health of women in this transitional era. The changing structure of the family, the blurred role definitions are certainly risk factors in the emerging pattern of early heart disease. Huge reserves of patience are required to cope with this new, changed family structure. Most do not have these reserves.

Effects of Global Economy on Quality of Life and Health

The current development of the global economy indicates that the 173 countries of the world will soon share a single marketplace. Demand and supply will respond to the compulsions of global competitiveness. Every country is eyeing the Rs 1.2 billion-strong

Indian market and its fabled 250 million middle class. No company can escape the restructuring, downsizing and blood-letting that is rampant today. The possibility of the pink slip stares every executive in the face.

It is being slowly realized that economic prosperity can lead to poverty in the quality of life and health. Is India gradually becoming a global back-office with uninteresting, boring, repetitive jobs being dumped on us? Is the joy of craftsmanship being replaced by the monotony of the assembly line? The expanding global economy and its resultant lethal workplace have created serious conflicts in the individual’s life. Many have to confront the question of how their values measure up viv-à-vis their need to own and have the world’s goodies.

Life was more happier when Apple and Blackberry were just fruits!

Work follows us everywhere. The blurring of work and leisure

has intensified in this era of twenty-four-hour access, when the

computer is just a fingertip away and the Blackberry and the cell

phone are as intimate as a heartbeat. The delicate tissues of the body

are constantly awash in the lethal chemical bath of chronic stress.

Interactive electronic devices have made stress continuous. Home is

no longer a refuge.

The revolution of rising expectations, fuelled by the global

perspective, provided by the media and internet creates unrelenting

stress. Einstein, Time magazine’s ‘Man of the Twentieth Century,’

warns: The concern for man and his destiny must always be the chief

interest of all technical effort. Never forget it among your diagrams

and equations.

Body and Stress

Any of the big five emotions—kama, kroda, madha, lobha, matsarya (lust, anger, arrogance, greed, jealousy, respectively) can flood the body with the chemicals of stress. Stress is destructive. Stress is ageing. Stress is a killer. Let us consider the most common emotion of this century— anger. What happens when you are angry? Thirty-six chemicals pour into the blood—lethal chemicals like adrenaline and histamine. Blood rushes through the heart, blood pressure and pulse rates shoot up. The rate of breathing increases. The body gets ready to fight or flee. Digestion is switched off. All parts of the brain, except the primitive ‘lizard brain’, are switched off.

The force of blood-flow in an enraged person causes minute tears in the tender fabric of the arteries. Fatty deposits find a convenient place to park themselves to repair the tears, and cholesterol, the plaster of paris of the body, slowly builds up to occlude the artery. Soon the tender flexible artery becomes stiff and hard, preparing the stage for a heart attack.

Be Happy - Get Relieved from Stress

The twenty-first century is the century of the Mind. The Mind is man’s last unconquered frontier. The Upanishads describe it as fast, fickle and uncontrollable, like a dozen swift horses travelling at breakneck speed. Mankind is paying a steep price for failing to learn more about the Mind before embarking on the race for success in the new millennium. Stress is the price we pay

for success. Stress stalks the precarious climb up the corporate ladder. The fashionable corporate high of fast-track leaders—eyes shining, excess nervous energy, multi-tasking, dynamism personified—is achieved at the expense of a tissue-destroying ‘fight or flight’ response. These individuals do not manage to have ‘rest and repair’ periods between emotional hijacks. Constant pressure fuels the adrenaline rush and damages the arteries. It adds to the flow of chemicals like cortisone and adrenaline in your blood. No one can be n a constant ‘fight or flight’ high and not destroy themselves. Today, twenty-somethings are dropping dead from heart attacks. A bypass surgery in the thirties has become a status symbol. The personal cost of stress includes burnout, chronic, disabling illnesses, crippling tensions in family life, and a loss of personal fulfillment and joy. The casualties are often children who live in the high-tension, pressure-cooker climate created in the homes of corporate high fliers.

The twenty-first century is the century of the Mind. The Mind is man’s last unconquered frontier. The Upanishads describe it as fast, fickle and uncontrollable, like a dozen swift horses travelling at breakneck speed. Mankind is paying a steep price for failing to learn more about the Mind before embarking on the race for success in the new millennium. Stress is the price we pay for success. Stress stalks the precarious climb up the corporate ladder. The fashionable corporate high of fast-track leaders—eyes shining, excess nervous energy, multi-tasking, dynamism personified—is achieved at the expense of a tissue-destroying ‘fight or flight’ response. These individuals do not manage to have ‘rest and repair’ periods between emotional hijacks. Constant pressure fuels the adrenaline rush and damages the arteries. It adds to the flow of chemicals like cortisone and adrenaline in your blood. No one can be n a constant ‘fight or flight’ high and not destroy themselves. Today, twenty-somethings are dropping dead from heart attacks. A bypass surgery in the thirties has become a status symbol. The personal cost of stress includes burnout, chronic, disabling illnesses, crippling tensions in family life, and a loss of personal fulfillment and joy. The casualties are often children who live in the high-tension, pressure-cooker climate created in the homes of corporate high fliers.

Attitude to bond shelf relationship

• Listen to yourself.

• Live in the present moment. Now. Every minute.

• Discipline yourself—it will give you true freedom.

• Do not pretend to be in total control.

• Allow yourself to be vulnerable sometimes.

• Ask for help. Network.

• Reinvent and renew yourself periodically.

• Make a sincere effort to keep promises and commitments—your internal sense of justice will punish all infractions.

• Forgive yourself.

• Explore the concept of acceptance of self.

• Love yourself. Accept yourself, your body and mind, as you are.

• In your quest for self-improvement, affirm and love yourself as you are today, here and now.

• Accept your life, good and bad as it is now, as a divine gift.

• Love another. A gift of yourself is the greatest gift you can give.

• Love others. Cacti can be as beautiful as a rose bush. Love them anyway.

• Reciprocate love. You are the mirror in which all your loved ones see themselves. You can soothe and inspire them by reflecting back an image that is lovable and competent. Calvin Cooley, renowned sociologist has described the Mirror Image thus: ‘I am what I think you think I am.’ If you constantly put down others, you can destroy them mentally. Their unhappiness can harm your mindscape.

• Accept your family as they are. Unrealistic expectations about your child can put unrelenting pressure on him. Mills and Boon expectations of your spouse can make them feel unloved and inadequate. They can then become cranky and difficult.

• Don’t seek revenge. Let go. Go forward and live.

• Compete only with yourself. Take pleasure in others’ growth and achievement.